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Posted on Feb 04, 2016 at 04:59 PM

A part-vent, part-educational.


It seems a common behaviour of men on this site (and other SD and dating sites) is the "flakey" behaviour. Flakiness basically means you are "undependable" or "unreliable".


Can you be relied upon? Are you a flake?

- If you say you'll come to a party and then forget to show up, you are flaky.

- If you say you'll call and then don't call, you are flaky.

- If you cancel plans and then don't reschedule, you are flaky.

- If you make a time to be somewhere, and you are always late, you are flaky.


FYI for Sugar Daddy Flakes: 

When you don't show up/ don't call/ don't reschedule, it demostrates a lack of respect. What upsets and angers women in this behaviour is not specifically that you didn't do that promised action, but that you a) didn't follow through by actually doing it... b) that you didn't try to make it right as soon as possible. To a woman this feels hurtful, because we think if you respected our time and company, you would have been reliable, or at least notified us of changes and made new plans.


Yes, I know, some people have social anxiety and flake on social events because of panic and fear! But at least show a little maturity to follow-up. Flakiness is not reserved to not showing up... but also the lack of interest in following-up, letting people know what's happening, not making new plans.. etc. 


Think of this whole scenario as a business meeting.... Do you leave a key business partner hanging? No! Because then you might lose a deal. Same with women! Don't leave us hanging....!!







Been flakey in the past? Want to learn how to make it right?

Be genuine about this. Does it matter to you to be a man of integrity? Does it matter to you to be considered reliable and dependable? Do you aim to be a man of action? Do you desire to be a REAL MAN? 


1. Call them. Yes, on the phone. A phone call is way more personal than a text message. If she is not picking up, send a quick text with a message something along the lines of, "Hi [name], I would really like to make a time to chat. When might you be free next?". Wait for their reply. If you don't hear back, consider it a big learning curve. You flaked on them, and that hurts people. Being flakey hurts relationships.


2. The first and most important thing you need to do when speaking to them is APOLOGIZE to her! Don't go into the excuses. It's not about justifications here. Admit your stupidity for being a flake, and now let's fix this mess...


3. Now, you want to correct the behaviour and change the tone of the connection. You have been a flake, and they might still be really angry with you. You need accept that if you flaked on someone and didn't follow-up, they may feel hurt and disrespected. Fixing this takes time, but you can fix it. I strong advise you to reschedule your date right then and there, on the phone with her. Make a time to catch up next, and tell them what you're hoping to acheive/ the purpose of that meetup. Now is not the time to be cheeky or sexual by the way. You're not out of the woods yet. 


4. Finish the call after making the rescheduled date. Between now and that rescheduled date, stay in touch with your girl.


5. On the day of the new (rescheduled) date, text her to let her know it's still happening. Arrive early, be yourself. If you have been seeing (and having sex with) this girl at least 3 weeks, you better bring her flowers. Now is the time for flowers, men! (note: flowers are not always advised- but for fixing a flakey sitatuion when the girl feels connected to you (as she will after 3 weeks of sex), flowers may help soothe her).


6. Relax. You know, it's basically good now. Honestly, we women are pretty easy-going when it comes to fixing things... because that's what women do. We FIX. We nurture, and we fix.  All we want is a little respect. When you called and apologized, we felt respected. When you rescheduled, we felt respected. When you turned up, we felt respected. Do you see the theme? It's the right thing to do- to respect us.


So...Don't be a flake, ok?




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