Here are some thoughts from a generous, experienced Sugar Daddy.
First you need to decide what you are seeking. You have to decide and be very clear with yourself what your expectations are. You should write this down and when asked you should be honest with the guy asking. And let him know what you are seeking. There are many eligible guys out there but you need to find the one that meets your criteria.
Some questions you should answer:
Do you want a local guy?
Are you willing or able to host? This is a big deal for the married guy.
Are you willing to have unprotected sex? This is a big deal for many guys.
What are your sexual boundaries?
Do you want this to be something long term?
How much time are you willing to invest per week or per month?
How much emotional capacity are you willing to give?
Do you want this guy to be a casual lover, boyfriend, or what?
How much is that time and emotional investment worth to YOU? But don’t share this number unless it is a counter offer.
If you travel to him, do you want to stay at his house?
Don't give it up for some dude unless you are pretty sure he meets your criteria. Duh!
My free advice: Don't make a big deal about the money but also don't get naked unless you have an agreement.
The women I have met that make a big deal about the money turn me off. When they make it clear that it is ONLY about the money, then it will be very short term, if at all. I know it IS about the money but I like to feel it is also about more than that. Get greedy and it is over. Once you meet and greet and find some chemistry....make sure the arrangement is very clear: amount, time required, sexual expectations...etc.
On the other hand, women that do not secure an agreement with me up front are completely at my mercy. I don't take advantage; but others do. And if she doesn't secure an agreement then I feel she has no self respect.
Let him make an offer first. Don't you be the one to "name your price." Please! That's degrading. You are NOT a hoe. Let him commit to something. If the amount is not acceptable then make a counter offer. He may offer a larger number than you would have requested so don't sell yourself short. He will also enjoy feeling like his is in charge.
A friend of mine wanted $500 per week and was willing to see her SD twice a week. She agreed to receive her money after the second visit. Well she screwed him on the first visit and got screwed on the second one because he never came back for the second one. Basically she had sex with a liar for free. So make sure you receive some compensation on the first visit, even if there is no sex involved. I prefer pay-as-you-go until there is a trusting relationship established that is going to be long term and that doesn’t happen over night.
Another friend of mine only wanted $100 a week. Guess what she received…a $100 a week. And she could have gotten tons more if she “only had a brain.”
Also, be careful on this site. Lots of weirdos, flakes and liars out there. If someone wants you to travel to see them....make sure they send you a prepaid ROUND TRIP ticket that is changeable. What if you want to leave early? There may be a cost associated with that change. And if they want you to fly like a poor college student....uh...no thanks. Go for first class or at least: non-stop and direct.
Single guys can easily travel with you. The downside of single is that they may fall in love with you or become too clingy. Married guys have limited availability but they also have a life outside of you. Guys that come in from out of town on business are pretty good too but may not be consistent or long term.
I think too often people sell themselves short, or don't take the time to reflect on what they're really looking for with this type of arrangement. It's important to really know yourself and what you're comfortable with before seeking out any type of romantic or sexual relationship.
Great article! It was very inciteful. Assuming you have met or have been chatting for some time and have plans to meet (for long distance arrangements) and there is chemistry, how does one approach the subject of an allowance without seeming as though they're "all about the money"? Who should initiate the conversation and when? Thanks in advance :)
Your information was recieved loud and clear. Its fantastic to see a SD openly admit that some SD are fake and its not always the SB in the wrong when it comes to the "run around". I see only advantages to this kind of arrangement as long as the people mesh, I see no point getting star struck and assuming that money is the only thing you can gain from dating a more mature gentlemen as long as he is that a "gentleman" Each to their own in the slap and tickle department but both parties have to be comfortable and it should be mutually enjoyable and fun.
I want a man who can make me a better women although I am that good really. At the moment I'm quite happy to just chat. What if a woman could take care of herself and just wanted a man who could take care of everything else? Like, dinner out/in, movies, spontaneous grocery shopping at 2.30 in the morning. Macdonalds for breakfast, dinner at a restaurant. Beersies at the local watching footy or league. Hell I'd make you better man wanna game of pool or darts sometime.